Today, I encountered many people who sigh. The most striking of all was an elderly lady sat opposite me on the train, she let out a deep sigh every few minutes.
I felt a bit sorry for her at first but, after a while, she just got on my nerves. I was curious though – what was her story? Was she carrying a heavy burden? Should I ask her if she is ok? Was sighing simply a habit?
We didn’t speak. I tried to gain eye contact, to give her a friendly smile, but she wasn’t interested. So I put on my ear phones, played a favourite song and let the music take me to a different place.
This small encounter reminded me that human energy – both positive and negative – can affect us and those around us.
Negativity, like the lady’s sighs, can fill a room, dampening the mood for everyone. But positivity – a smile, a kind word, a small gesture, a dad joke or simply radiating calm can lift an entire space.
It’s not about pretending life is perfect but about focusing on positive things. Kathryn (my wife) and her whole family do this and I admire them so much for this.
Sighs have their place, of course. They’re an expression, a release of tension. But when they become our default response, I’d suggest a shift in perspective.
For me, it’s the little things that lift me up each day. Every morning, for example, I get up an hour earlier than everyone else and make a fresh coffee. This isn’t a footnote in my story; it is my story. It helps me relax and often washes away the negativity that creeps into my head at 4am!
It’s up to us to not let the things that go wrong define us, though I acknowledge this isn’t easy for everyone because everyone’s situation is different – our backgrounds, genetics and circumstances shape our perspectives.
On the whole though, my advice is simple:
- Be present: Train your senses to notice the small things around you.
- Be grateful: For what you have, not what you don’t.
- Be kind: To others, yes, but also to yourself. Let go of what weighs you down.
As the train pulled into my stop, I was relieved to leave that lady behind. She may have been having a bad day but her mood was bringing me down.
I certainly don’t want to sigh my way through life. What’s the point? Life deserves to be seen, felt and enjoyed.
So here’s to the singers, the smilers, the jokers and everyone who puts on a brave face in times of adversity. Notwithstanding genuine tragedies, there’s positivity in almost every moment if you choose to see it that way.